Okay.. Sis.. Im blogging again... better hold on tight. LOL
On any given day I encounter people who make me believe that our society is doomed.
Every night on the news, we hear of Obama's master plans.. to take away from the rich (the evil ones) and give to the poor (oh, those helpless ones).. Obama thinks that doing so is the answer.. that once he achieves his goal humanity will be better for it... what grand delusions of of grandure that man has.
Does he not realize that there are flaws in his plan beyond measure... that he is absolutely destroying everything this nation was built on. I believe tho, that is ultimately his plan. It must be.
First, I am sooo far from rich it isn't funny. However, I realize that those that are rich serve their purpose to some degree. It are those individuals who fund companies... who provide jobs.. it is trickle down. Am I happy that they are rich and Im not.. heck no.. but I understand the role they play.
Obama's answer is to cater to the needs of the poor and under priviledged. That absolutely drives me crazy. Instead of motivating citizens to take an active role in our society, for rewarding success, and to encourage everyone to prosper, Obama is feeding into the mentality that it is governments job to take care of those that are unwilling to put forth the effort to succeed. We have bred hundreds of thousands of individuals who live their life with their hand out and without any intention of supporting themselves let alone their countless children.
For years, I have been warned that in all likelihood, there will not be Social Security available to me when I am elderly. I believe that to be true... that system is broken... thus the Government continues to take my money on a daily basis with the empty promise that I will be able to collect when my time comes. I truly wish that people would look at that program for not only what it is (a failure) but how that one program is just a glimpse into our nations future.
It isn't the elderly who depend on Social Security that has bankrupted the program. Those individuals spent their entire lives building this country through their hard work and earned every dime they put into the system. No, it isn't those people. Instead it is the much younger group of individuals who (due to choices such as drug and alcohol abuse and others) have hooked themselves up to Social Security like it was an IV to feed off of. The huge majority of them have found themselves in that position purely due to poor choices..
Poor choices... wow.. what a loaded issue huh? Gonna have to wait for the next blog to find out. :)
Monday, August 10, 2009
Sunday, May 17, 2009
Reflection
This past weekend I went to a wedding... not my ideal event to attend. Unfortunately... I am far to cynical. Don't get me wrong... I pray that the vows I witnessed withstand the test of time.. that Lacey & David will continue to grow together and appreciate each other... With God's help and guidance, they can make it... only time will tell.
As I was listening to the vows.. I was thinking to myself how much I appreciate the OLD traditional vows.. to have and to hold.. to love and to honor... to obey.. for richer and poorer... this wedding did not contain that... but instead a short version not mentioning the specifics that the traditional vows did. I was disappointed by that... but then again... mine were tradition (so many years ago, with the exception of the obey part) and look where that got me.
Anyway... there were two "quotes" I heard during the evening (not from the bride or groom) which got me thinking...
1) "The more beautiful they are... the bitchier they are." I swear... if I had a mouthful of liquid in my mouth at that moment, it would have shot across the room. Keep in mind that one of the reasons I found this comment to be hysterical is the fact (that in my opinion), I am a far stretch from beautiful. I believe that one of the things I have learned in the last 12 years since my divorce is that even if a man may believe that to be true (that prettier girls are bitches), it doesn't make a difference. They will still endure a horrible relationship with a "gorgeous" girl instead of taking time to look past the outer shell. But then again... I have no desire to be with a man who is shallow enough to only care about the outside... But hearing a man (one whom I hold in high regard) say that just hit me silly.. I wanted to turn to him and say "Duh, Stupid".
2) "She knew that when I married her, now she expects me to change". WOW... this alone is deserving of its own blog... so I will spend the rest of my evening pondering... why would you marry someone with an expectation that you can get them to change??? Why marry someone that you aren't 100% certain that you can live with any preexisting quirks? How can someone marry someone with hopes of changing that person and not realize that the other partner may not be secretly thinking the same about them? Isn't hoping for that change after the vows a recipe for disaster??
As I was listening to the vows.. I was thinking to myself how much I appreciate the OLD traditional vows.. to have and to hold.. to love and to honor... to obey.. for richer and poorer... this wedding did not contain that... but instead a short version not mentioning the specifics that the traditional vows did. I was disappointed by that... but then again... mine were tradition (so many years ago, with the exception of the obey part) and look where that got me.
Anyway... there were two "quotes" I heard during the evening (not from the bride or groom) which got me thinking...
1) "The more beautiful they are... the bitchier they are." I swear... if I had a mouthful of liquid in my mouth at that moment, it would have shot across the room. Keep in mind that one of the reasons I found this comment to be hysterical is the fact (that in my opinion), I am a far stretch from beautiful. I believe that one of the things I have learned in the last 12 years since my divorce is that even if a man may believe that to be true (that prettier girls are bitches), it doesn't make a difference. They will still endure a horrible relationship with a "gorgeous" girl instead of taking time to look past the outer shell. But then again... I have no desire to be with a man who is shallow enough to only care about the outside... But hearing a man (one whom I hold in high regard) say that just hit me silly.. I wanted to turn to him and say "Duh, Stupid".
2) "She knew that when I married her, now she expects me to change". WOW... this alone is deserving of its own blog... so I will spend the rest of my evening pondering... why would you marry someone with an expectation that you can get them to change??? Why marry someone that you aren't 100% certain that you can live with any preexisting quirks? How can someone marry someone with hopes of changing that person and not realize that the other partner may not be secretly thinking the same about them? Isn't hoping for that change after the vows a recipe for disaster??
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Free will... how is that working for us?
One of the things that God provided us was the ability to exercise free will... to make our own decisions ... I can't help but wonder if that was truly a good thing. One look around makes me believe that free will may actually be detrimental to the human race. Every little choice we make changes our world.. and the world of those around us... if even just a little.
It isn't so much the little choices that I am talking about... the fill up the gas tank now or later... the pizza or fish for dinner... the call in sick or go to work calls... tho all of those impact our lives. Instead... for me.. the decision that I personally find frustrating is the decision to be a productive member of our world. In my opinion, more and more people are choosing not to be... and in the process are taking this world screaming down a slippery slope.
In my job, everyday I witness parents who exercise free will and reproduce time and again without any intention of taking a active role in their child's life. Unfortunately, this problem has continued to increase at an alarming rate. I am not talking about "deadbeat dads", as that is no longer an accurate label.. I am talking about deadbeat PARENTS. This is not a gender issue... it is a full blown societal issue.
It has been my experience that more and more adults are having children, multiple children by multiple partners with little or no intention of taking any sort of role in that child's life. I don't personally believe that a couple should automatically marry due to the birth of a child, however I do believe that as a parent, marriage or not, there is a certain level of responsibility that should be exercised and that every child brought into this world should be able to expect to be loved, support (both financially and emotionally), and kept safe from harm. Tragically, in my opinion most children born today are not going to have those expectations met.
I was fortunate, raised in a middle class home with parents who not only loved each other but loved each of their children. They expected and earned the respect of their children and in return supported, loved, and taught their children how to thrive in the world. My parents were willing to do anything it took to support their family. There were many times that my father worked long hours at multiple jobs completing whatever tasks necessary to meet his obligations. Back then... there wasn't any other option. My mother was 16 when my oldest sister was born. My father didn't run.. didn't slack on his obligations. No, they married and from that day forward honored their vows to one another and busted their a$$ to support their family. In the process, they lead by example and taught each of their children valuable lessons. Of their children, 2 joined the military, none ever collected unemployment, and there have been no children born out of wedlock. I dare you to find many families like that now. To be fair... the one place where each of us failed in was following the example of marriage.. as we have all been divorced... that is a sad side note.
Move forward to today where the divorce rate is staggering and more children are born out of wedlock than ever before... add to that the increased number of teen pregnancy and it is a recipe for disaster. At what point did this become "acceptable" by our society? At what point did parents begin to fail their children by not holding them to the standards that previous generations had worked hard to establish? At what point did we as a society choose to let our children off the hook and slack on their responsibilities?
This topic will surely continue.. just wanted to post this one for now..
It isn't so much the little choices that I am talking about... the fill up the gas tank now or later... the pizza or fish for dinner... the call in sick or go to work calls... tho all of those impact our lives. Instead... for me.. the decision that I personally find frustrating is the decision to be a productive member of our world. In my opinion, more and more people are choosing not to be... and in the process are taking this world screaming down a slippery slope.
In my job, everyday I witness parents who exercise free will and reproduce time and again without any intention of taking a active role in their child's life. Unfortunately, this problem has continued to increase at an alarming rate. I am not talking about "deadbeat dads", as that is no longer an accurate label.. I am talking about deadbeat PARENTS. This is not a gender issue... it is a full blown societal issue.
It has been my experience that more and more adults are having children, multiple children by multiple partners with little or no intention of taking any sort of role in that child's life. I don't personally believe that a couple should automatically marry due to the birth of a child, however I do believe that as a parent, marriage or not, there is a certain level of responsibility that should be exercised and that every child brought into this world should be able to expect to be loved, support (both financially and emotionally), and kept safe from harm. Tragically, in my opinion most children born today are not going to have those expectations met.
I was fortunate, raised in a middle class home with parents who not only loved each other but loved each of their children. They expected and earned the respect of their children and in return supported, loved, and taught their children how to thrive in the world. My parents were willing to do anything it took to support their family. There were many times that my father worked long hours at multiple jobs completing whatever tasks necessary to meet his obligations. Back then... there wasn't any other option. My mother was 16 when my oldest sister was born. My father didn't run.. didn't slack on his obligations. No, they married and from that day forward honored their vows to one another and busted their a$$ to support their family. In the process, they lead by example and taught each of their children valuable lessons. Of their children, 2 joined the military, none ever collected unemployment, and there have been no children born out of wedlock. I dare you to find many families like that now. To be fair... the one place where each of us failed in was following the example of marriage.. as we have all been divorced... that is a sad side note.
Move forward to today where the divorce rate is staggering and more children are born out of wedlock than ever before... add to that the increased number of teen pregnancy and it is a recipe for disaster. At what point did this become "acceptable" by our society? At what point did parents begin to fail their children by not holding them to the standards that previous generations had worked hard to establish? At what point did we as a society choose to let our children off the hook and slack on their responsibilities?
This topic will surely continue.. just wanted to post this one for now..
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Proud to be his Mom...
This blog isn't what I had anticipated writing tonight... I had actually had a blog brewing/festering in my head all day today... but life sometimes takes an unexpected turn... and sometimes those turns are well worth the detour...
This evening my son JP and I went to my best friends house to celebrate her son Aaron's 17Th birthday (Say it isn't so) with our wonderful HUGE group of friends. This group of friends, we have been together for years... our lives intertwine in unexpected ways... and all though we don't always agree or share the same philosophy, we are 100% supportive. One of the greatest advantages of having such an involved large group of friends is that you grow together and the bonds strengthen over time... and our children form strong bonds which we hope will last a life time. Our kids range in age... 17 all the way down to 3 months (and one on the way) and each of these kids are wonderful, energetic, and unique in their own way.
During this gathering this evening, my son brought to my attention that he was upset by the way that one of the other kids (K) in our group is bullied at school. It was the first time that he had mentioned it to me, and since JP isn't one to tell tales and was honestly upset about it, I was very alarmed. After whispering to me about this for a few moments, I encouraged him to consider speaking privately with his (K's) mom my friend (J) and share with her what he has witnessing. Yes, I knew I could have easily have gone to J myself and shared what I had been told by my son, but I felt that the impact would be more helpful if JP took the action upon himself. I am proud to say that he did speak with J and that he has further decided that he feels he needs to speak with the Principal directly regarding this.
On our way home, I expressed to JP just how proud I am of him. See, JP himself has had a history of being bullied due to his short stature. Perhaps, that actually is what has made him take notice of what K has had to endure. This unexpected development has displayed to me just how much JP has begun to mature. He is truly beginning to take notice of things that are going on around him, and I can only hope and pray that he will continue to stand up for what is right without regard to what others may think of him.
I am proud of him... and always will be.
This evening my son JP and I went to my best friends house to celebrate her son Aaron's 17Th birthday (Say it isn't so) with our wonderful HUGE group of friends. This group of friends, we have been together for years... our lives intertwine in unexpected ways... and all though we don't always agree or share the same philosophy, we are 100% supportive. One of the greatest advantages of having such an involved large group of friends is that you grow together and the bonds strengthen over time... and our children form strong bonds which we hope will last a life time. Our kids range in age... 17 all the way down to 3 months (and one on the way) and each of these kids are wonderful, energetic, and unique in their own way.
During this gathering this evening, my son brought to my attention that he was upset by the way that one of the other kids (K) in our group is bullied at school. It was the first time that he had mentioned it to me, and since JP isn't one to tell tales and was honestly upset about it, I was very alarmed. After whispering to me about this for a few moments, I encouraged him to consider speaking privately with his (K's) mom my friend (J) and share with her what he has witnessing. Yes, I knew I could have easily have gone to J myself and shared what I had been told by my son, but I felt that the impact would be more helpful if JP took the action upon himself. I am proud to say that he did speak with J and that he has further decided that he feels he needs to speak with the Principal directly regarding this.
On our way home, I expressed to JP just how proud I am of him. See, JP himself has had a history of being bullied due to his short stature. Perhaps, that actually is what has made him take notice of what K has had to endure. This unexpected development has displayed to me just how much JP has begun to mature. He is truly beginning to take notice of things that are going on around him, and I can only hope and pray that he will continue to stand up for what is right without regard to what others may think of him.
I am proud of him... and always will be.
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Society... oh what a mess
Warning.. this may offend... so read understanding that this is MY opinion, which I am entitled to have and voice... and you are able to chose to stop reading now...
Today there were many news articles today regarding the number of americans that rely on Food Stamps to meet their food needs.... The food stamp program was created to assist americans in obtaining the food needed for survival. The concept itself was not only noble but certainly necessary as the number of hungry continues to climb. Unfortunately.. the climb has continued even with this assistance program... and as the report indicated Missouri is number one when it comes to the number of applicants.
In my opinion, there are two categories of recipients. 1) Those who through no fault of their own have found them selves in a temporary position of hardship and must rely on the government to assist them in meeting their needs. 2) Those who continue to repeat the cycle of "entitlement" who believe that it is the governments duty to support them while they continue to contribute little to our society.
To complicate matters, this country is currently experiencing one of the most difficult economic times since the depression. The numbers of individuals who have found themselves unexpectedly unemployed and as a result unable (notice I did NOT say unwilling) to support themselves and their families. To compound the problem, mortgage rates are incredibly high and there is no certainty as to when our economic situation as a country will begin to recover. It is because of this, that I believe so many people have found themselves in Category 1, relying on the government not by choice but out of necessity.
Category 2 however is a completely different matter, and in my opinion the largest category. As a country, we have allowed a growing population of people to grow, those who believe that they are "entitled" to whatever they can lie, cheat, steal, and rob to get their hands on. For them, it is a choice. They do not have the motivation to improve their lives through hard work. Instead, they continue to make the same poor choices and expect the government to give them a hand out. Sadly, I am referring to individuals here. I am referring to families who lead by example and teach their children to continue the cycle.
It is no surprise to me that Missouri is labeled as #1... it is a very sad label and one that should not bring pride to anyone who resides here. This state appears to have (based on my experience) a very large population of lazy unmotivated people who would rather figure out ways to defraud, steal, and rob than to be contributors to our state... thus our country.
People of this country better wake up...
Today there were many news articles today regarding the number of americans that rely on Food Stamps to meet their food needs.... The food stamp program was created to assist americans in obtaining the food needed for survival. The concept itself was not only noble but certainly necessary as the number of hungry continues to climb. Unfortunately.. the climb has continued even with this assistance program... and as the report indicated Missouri is number one when it comes to the number of applicants.
In my opinion, there are two categories of recipients. 1) Those who through no fault of their own have found them selves in a temporary position of hardship and must rely on the government to assist them in meeting their needs. 2) Those who continue to repeat the cycle of "entitlement" who believe that it is the governments duty to support them while they continue to contribute little to our society.
To complicate matters, this country is currently experiencing one of the most difficult economic times since the depression. The numbers of individuals who have found themselves unexpectedly unemployed and as a result unable (notice I did NOT say unwilling) to support themselves and their families. To compound the problem, mortgage rates are incredibly high and there is no certainty as to when our economic situation as a country will begin to recover. It is because of this, that I believe so many people have found themselves in Category 1, relying on the government not by choice but out of necessity.
Category 2 however is a completely different matter, and in my opinion the largest category. As a country, we have allowed a growing population of people to grow, those who believe that they are "entitled" to whatever they can lie, cheat, steal, and rob to get their hands on. For them, it is a choice. They do not have the motivation to improve their lives through hard work. Instead, they continue to make the same poor choices and expect the government to give them a hand out. Sadly, I am referring to individuals here. I am referring to families who lead by example and teach their children to continue the cycle.
It is no surprise to me that Missouri is labeled as #1... it is a very sad label and one that should not bring pride to anyone who resides here. This state appears to have (based on my experience) a very large population of lazy unmotivated people who would rather figure out ways to defraud, steal, and rob than to be contributors to our state... thus our country.
People of this country better wake up...
Monday, May 11, 2009
Comedy or Tragedy... escapism
Thank Heavens for Monday nights... it is what actually gets me through Mondays.. to know that after spending hours at work I get to come home and share a solid 30 minutes with my son consumed with laughter as we watch Big Bang.. it truly is the highlight of my week. Unfortunately, tonight's episode was the season finale... dang it... after laughing for 30 minutes my son looks at me with a straight face and says "Your Mondays are gonna suck now"... oh how right he is. :(
Escapism.. I guess that is what that 30 minutes is for me... escaping from the doldrums of everyday life into a world much funnier.... wittier.. than mine. A case of fabulous characters who do things/say things/think things that I can only imagine doing... if I had the sense of humor... the courage... the comedic timing...
In the world we live in.... escapism has its advantages and I will take part whenever the opportunity arises.. whether it be a funny show like Big Bang... or a romantic comedy (I can only take those in VERY small doses).
If only the whole world was a sitcom... which character would you be?
(As I type this.. I hear my son laughing in his room as he is watching George Lopez... laughter is good for the soul... especially when it is the laughter of your child). I will sleep well tonight :)
Escapism.. I guess that is what that 30 minutes is for me... escaping from the doldrums of everyday life into a world much funnier.... wittier.. than mine. A case of fabulous characters who do things/say things/think things that I can only imagine doing... if I had the sense of humor... the courage... the comedic timing...
In the world we live in.... escapism has its advantages and I will take part whenever the opportunity arises.. whether it be a funny show like Big Bang... or a romantic comedy (I can only take those in VERY small doses).
If only the whole world was a sitcom... which character would you be?
(As I type this.. I hear my son laughing in his room as he is watching George Lopez... laughter is good for the soul... especially when it is the laughter of your child). I will sleep well tonight :)
Saturday, May 9, 2009
Choices...
Choices... those opportunities in life in which we make individual decisions which may effect our lives forever. The choice to join the military, the choice to marry and to whom, the choice to have children and how many, the choice as to who you want in your life, and most importantly the choice on whether you embrace happiness or hide from it... or even... the choice to not make a choice...
Choice is a debate that my best friend Carrie and I have had on numerous occassions. You see, she is Tigger... and I am Eeyore. She is the constant optimist, always sees the silver lining in every part of her life... she is happy by nature (I believe) tho she says she is happy by choice. She believes that I have made a choice to be Eeyore... the negative half empty kinda gal. If you happened to have watched the Michael J. Fox special that aired last week on tv, you would have seen not only stories of people like Carrie who have this incredible ability of optimism, but you would have also seen that studies prove that there is in fact a genetic component of optimism.
I personally believe that except for a minority (like Carrie), optimism is something that is strongly tied to genetics. That being said, I will agree that it can be learned, taught, and embraced. I unfortunately am not the greatest student in this area.
I don't recall being negative growing up, I believe I saw the world in a positive light. Unfortunately, choices I made in my life led me to a point where negativity has taken a strong hold. My career choice has certainly played a huge factor in making me cynical, judgmental, and overall rather negative.
I am in fact a true Eeyore. I tend to concentrate on the negative... at least when it comes to me personally. I am not overly optimistic and struggle with this aspect of my life. However, I find it very very easy to be optimistic for those in my life. When someone I care about is down or going through a terrible time... I find it easy to support them and point out the positive in any given situation. The irony of this is not lost on me. I honestly wish that I was capable of having that optimistic ability when reflecting on my own life. Alas, as I said, I am not a good student in this area.
I can only imagine how frustrated many of my friends become (especially Carrie) in my continued negative prespective... it takes a whole lot of effort on my part to be positive... to make that choice... I wish it came easier to me.. I often promise myself that I will make more of an effort.. tho I tend to fall short... all I can do is keep trying...
Choice is a debate that my best friend Carrie and I have had on numerous occassions. You see, she is Tigger... and I am Eeyore. She is the constant optimist, always sees the silver lining in every part of her life... she is happy by nature (I believe) tho she says she is happy by choice. She believes that I have made a choice to be Eeyore... the negative half empty kinda gal. If you happened to have watched the Michael J. Fox special that aired last week on tv, you would have seen not only stories of people like Carrie who have this incredible ability of optimism, but you would have also seen that studies prove that there is in fact a genetic component of optimism.
I personally believe that except for a minority (like Carrie), optimism is something that is strongly tied to genetics. That being said, I will agree that it can be learned, taught, and embraced. I unfortunately am not the greatest student in this area.
I don't recall being negative growing up, I believe I saw the world in a positive light. Unfortunately, choices I made in my life led me to a point where negativity has taken a strong hold. My career choice has certainly played a huge factor in making me cynical, judgmental, and overall rather negative.
I am in fact a true Eeyore. I tend to concentrate on the negative... at least when it comes to me personally. I am not overly optimistic and struggle with this aspect of my life. However, I find it very very easy to be optimistic for those in my life. When someone I care about is down or going through a terrible time... I find it easy to support them and point out the positive in any given situation. The irony of this is not lost on me. I honestly wish that I was capable of having that optimistic ability when reflecting on my own life. Alas, as I said, I am not a good student in this area.
I can only imagine how frustrated many of my friends become (especially Carrie) in my continued negative prespective... it takes a whole lot of effort on my part to be positive... to make that choice... I wish it came easier to me.. I often promise myself that I will make more of an effort.. tho I tend to fall short... all I can do is keep trying...
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