Choices...

Choices... those opportunities in life in which we make individual decisions which may effect our lives forever. The choice to join the military, the choice to marry and to whom, the choice to have children and how many, the choice as to who you want in your life, and most importantly the choice on whether you embrace happiness or hide from it... or even... the choice to not make a choice...

Choice is a debate that my best friend Carrie and I have had on numerous occassions. You see, she is Tigger... and I am Eeyore. She is the constant optimist, always sees the silver lining in every part of her life... she is happy by nature (I believe) tho she says she is happy by choice. She believes that I have made a choice to be Eeyore... the negative half empty kinda gal. If you happened to have watched the Michael J. Fox special that aired last week on tv, you would have seen not only stories of people like Carrie who have this incredible ability of optimism, but you would have also seen that studies prove that there is in fact a genetic component of optimism.

I personally believe that except for a minority (like Carrie), optimism is something that is strongly tied to genetics. That being said, I will agree that it can be learned, taught, and embraced. I unfortunately am not the greatest student in this area.

I don't recall being negative growing up, I believe I saw the world in a positive light. Unfortunately, choices I made in my life led me to a point where negativity has taken a strong hold. My career choice has certainly played a huge factor in making me cynical, judgmental, and overall rather negative.

I am in fact a true Eeyore. I tend to concentrate on the negative... at least when it comes to me personally. I am not overly optimistic and struggle with this aspect of my life. However, I find it very very easy to be optimistic for those in my life. When someone I care about is down or going through a terrible time... I find it easy to support them and point out the positive in any given situation. The irony of this is not lost on me. I honestly wish that I was capable of having that optimistic ability when reflecting on my own life. Alas, as I said, I am not a good student in this area.

I can only imagine how frustrated many of my friends become (especially Carrie) in my continued negative prespective... it takes a whole lot of effort on my part to be positive... to make that choice... I wish it came easier to me.. I often promise myself that I will make more of an effort.. tho I tend to fall short... all I can do is keep trying...